I am really stoked, but only if people still say that

I have been asked by Mr DVL, husband of DVL, to help out their daughter EML in a school project. EML has to send a paper cut out of a character named FLAT STANLEY to friends around the world, and these friends have to take a photograph of FLAT STANLEY in surroundings that represent the area in which they live, and then mail it back. For instance I could take a picture of FLAT STANLEY by the Lake Huron shoreline, or in front of the Tawas City Burger King, and I'm wondering just where I stand in "the friends around the world" rankings, I'm hoping I'm at least in the somewhere in the Top 50, and I hope that someone didn't back out at the last moment, and I'm just an emergency selection, you know like when you have a dinner party and the guy you set up with your weird cousin gets sick, and then you have to find someone else on short notice, and I bet that guy wasn't sick after all, I bet he just found out how weird your weird cousin really is, I mean, I just don't want to be the replacement guy for the weird cousin, unless of course the weird cousin has a nice rack and a lot of money.
I am taking this very serious, because if EML gets an A on this project it may inspire her to buckle down in school, and yeah, I'm sure she buckles down now, so imagine how good she could do if she really buckled down, I mean she could become her high school valedictorian, and ace her SATs, and turn down a soccer scholarship to Stanford for an academic scholarship to Harvard, and then she could write a really important book, then marry a rock star, then become the third female president of the United States, after Hillary Rodham Clinton, and that Chinese girl that used to be on the View.
So you can see why it is imperative that I do the best job possible here!