Saturday, March 14, 2009

There's nobody here, except the people who are always here.

So, I'm sitting here, and I'm very hungry, I mean very hungry, I mean like I might pass out any minute hungry.
So, I mean, but, I don't know what to eat.
Maybe a Hungry Man Dinner, mmmmmmmmm, that sounds good, or maybe peanut bu ... no, none of that, or chicken broth, no way am I eating chicken broth, and you don't really eat chicken broth, do you, you just sort of let it slide down, and seriously after my liquid diet I don't care if I ever taste, (ha, you don't taste broth!) I don't care if I ever taste chicken broth again in my mortal life, and did I tell you that I spilt a whole cup of vegetable broth on myself while I was in the hospital, and I started screaming OWOWOWOWOWOWOW, which is not to be confused with WoW, which is still kicking my ass, I started screaming, ok, not screaming, but just a notch or two below screaming, yeah, I started screaming to the negative 2, and a shitload of nurses, and aides, and techs, and social workers, and that guy that used to be on TAXI all came running in thinking that I was about to fall, but I was sitting down, so I really couldn't fall, but they came running in anyway, and oh yeah, I wasn't screaming OWOWOWOWOWOW, I was screaming, well, you know, not quite screaming OWOWOWHELPMEHELPMEHELPMOWOWOWOWHELPMEHELPMHELPME, and they all came running in, and found out I wasn't falling, and maybe the broth wasn't all that hot, but it was hot enough to send me into hysterics, and to cut a long story short the staff cleaned me up, and made sure my secret parts didn't get burnt, and the incisions were ok, and to tell you the truth I felt kind of sheepish about all the hubbub, but not that sheepish, then I went back to bed and had some ginger ale.
I think I'm still hungry, back to you Felipe ...

Eh-thank you Mister Senor Boz.
Mister Senor Boz my friend Eduardo would like to come eh-visit me on my eh-day off ...

You don't get a day off.

Oh, I see Mister Senor Boz, I will eh-fix you eh-something to eat eh-now. Would you like some eh-Mofongo?

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Why, oh why, did I eat ice cream right out of the carton at 8:00 in the morning?

Because it was there.
Because I've really been on an ice cream binge since I got back from LA.
Because it was chocolate peanut butter swirl, or cup, or something like that.
Where's Felipe, I need somebody to draw my bath.
Ok, there really is no Felipe, that's just a character I came up with at the spur of the moment when I was writing an email to a friend that haunts the local drugstore looking for strange products that she herself would never use, but has no qualms about recommending to friends, like I said, Felipe is just a character I came up with at the spur of the moment when emailing a friend and it just flowed out of my mind, into my fingers, and then tippy tippy tapped from my fingers, to my keyboard, where it now resides in my computer and on my monitor, singing it's body electric across the world wide web forever and ever and ever.
I wish I hadn't eaten all the ice cream because I think I want some more.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

The Adventures of Felipe, Boz's Slightly Effeminate Manservant. #2

Hello, I am once again Felipe, Mister Senor Boz's slightly effeminate manservant.
Ever since Mister Senor Boz's eh-mucho serious health problems of the past few months. I have taken to eh-sleeping on a pallet at the foot of Mister Senor Boz's bed. Mister Senor Boz assures me that this is no longer necessary, but I can tell by the eh-tone in his eh-voice that he eh-longs for my companionship.
Mister Senor Boz is a proud man and oftentimes you eh-must listen to what he eh-means, and not eh-what he says.
Eh-scuse me, but I hear Mister Senor Boz eh-calling for my services from a room that is not this eh-room. Such is the life of a slightly effeminate manservant.

The Adventures of Felipe, Boz's Slightly Effeminate Manservant.

Hello, I am Felipe, Mister Senor Boz's slightly effeminate manservant.
I am 25 years old, but I have been told frequently that I could pass for 15.
Mister Senor Boz has been very eh-busy lately and one of my new eh-duties is to make sure that Mister Senor Boz's delightful blog, The Eh-Grand Ennui, does not fall into disrepair.
Eh-scuse me now, I have to go take my music lesson. Mister Senor Boz would like me to learn to sing and play in the fashion of the post heroin addicted Eric Clapton so on nights when Mister Senor Boz has trouble eh-sleeping perhaps I can serenade him till slumber embraces him.

Monday, March 09, 2009

I heard that Eric Clapton song, where he pushes his son out the window, twice on the radio today.

Hello, this isn't boz.
I'm just some guy who hacked into boz's blog today to see if he is keeping his word about re-inventing blogging.
So far, I'm not real sure.
I mean, you know boz as well as I do, and mostly his intentions are good, but yeah, he has a short attention span.
That's all, I've only got five minutes before the internet police can trace this hack.

Sunday, March 08, 2009

Have you ever sneezed 15 times in a row? I have.

Damn, it's like one in the afternoon, and I just got out of bed, you know, not because I'm lazy, but because of daylight savings time. I have this theory about daylight savings time, My theory is the day before DST starts or ends I always stay up as late as I can and then totally disregard the time change on the next day. Of course, this fucks up my whole day, but it's a small price to pay for my sanity, or my tenuous grasp on sanity, or my long walk off a short pier to the bosom of insanity.
Don't forget to turn the lights off when you leave, I'm going back to bed.

I don't know which clock to believe, the one that says 3:24, the one that says 4:24, or the one in my head that tells me that it's time to kill the ..

monkeys, kill all the monkeys.

Just a picture of the mountains outside my airplane window on my flight home from LA. I did tell you that I was in LA, didn't I? Anyway, I don't know what mountains these are, they might be the ones around Los Angeles, or they might be the Rocky Mountains, or the lesser known Bullwinkle Mountains

I'm so very sleepy, but you know, when I close my eyes there's nothing there, well,
that's not really accurate, because if there was nothing there I'd probably be asleep, so there is SOMETHING there, it just isn't sleep. I think maybe it's a hologram of GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, yeah, that's it.

All my old blog friends are dead and gone ... sniff, sniff, sniffer-o-o-o-o

Ok, I left one blog link, but that's mostly so I'll know how to post new blog links if I ever get any new blog links, but I'll tell you, they're all gone, ok I should probably link Malone's blog, cause he sort of still blogs, and did I tell you I met him when I was in LA, and we both said that we were going to re-invent blogging, but I think it's still in the planning stage, or maybe the procrastination stage, but uhhh ...
Long live blogging and ...
Long live the dancing baby.
Vive la baby!!!

Saturday, March 07, 2009

Spring forward ... and fall flat on your face and get a nasty gash in your forehead, oh no, not me, not this year.

Boz, what happened to your hair, I ask myself using the third person, which I have become so fond of.



This is what happens when they ask if you'd like to try a #2 clipper attachment, and you're like, what the hell, it will always grow back if I don't like it.
It sort of looks like I'm getting ready for brain surgery, doesn't it.

Friday, March 06, 2009

Maybe this proves that I'm not such a nerd after all.

Ok, World of Warcraft is kicking my ass.
My character's name is Bozbozenboz, and he's a human, and a paladin, and I really don't know what that is, but he has a big wooden hammer that he's supposed to kill things with, but so far all he has killed is a cute little bunny, and he's been killed twice, once by some kind of rat or something, and another time by a couple of teenage punks with spotty complexions hanging around outside the bowling alley, and to add insult to injury some level 14 geek with a character name of something like GoodKingPoofEnToofer called me a noob!!!
I have a long road ahead of me.

Monday, March 02, 2009

Nerd alert, nerd alert, nerd alert ...

It's not my fault, I was brainwashed and re-programmed by the dvl family. Now I just need a suitable screen name, and a clue to what the fuck the game is all about.

More from LA

This picture was taken from the terrace of the Beverly Plaza which is a huge mall just about a mile and a half from where dvl lives. The mall is like 15 stories high, and has all sorts of cool stores that I have never heard of, but they did have a Foot Locker and that is where I used my two $50.00 gift cards to buy myself two pairs of Chucks, and while we were on the terrace dvl drank a coffee from Starbucks (I think it was Starbucks.) and I drank a diet Coke from either a Chinese, Korean, or Thai restaurant.
This is probably the first of many pictures that I took of the hills surrounding the city, which of course, dvl was quick to point out that I must really love the mountains, and that was just before she tried to harvest my organs to sell on the black market and sell my soul to the Scientologists on Hollywood Blvd.

Sunday, March 01, 2009

The Grand Ennui, and blogging in general, reborn!!!

Talk about old school! Look who I met in LA, dvl and Kevynnn Malone, and we all agreed that it is time for a rebirth of blogging, normal people style.