1. Hey look at my pic over there, I'm adorable.
2. My scathing political commentary.
3. The odd chance that #117 will make a return.
4. To make my arch-rival, former Monkees drummer Mickey Dolenz, jealous.
5. To make sure I haven't died.
6. I have Zil Zheaton's private phone number.
7. I NEED VALIDATION!!!
8. I have all the latest lottery results.
9. Why not, you can always masturbate later.
10. I've got gum!!!
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