A rabbi and a harridan walk into a bar

I have been kind of distraught lately.
A van load of teenage retarded boys passed me on the highway yesterday.
I don't mean they were retarded in the hip cool way you young people use the word retarded, I mean they were retarded as in crayons up the nose and zipping their shirt in their fly retarded.
Ok, a retard wasn't driving the van, and by the way, it was a long van, I mean, there must have been eight retarded teenagers all strapped in and ready to go to a Chris Burke concert, but no, a retard wasn't driving the van, it was a retard's mom who was driving the van, and on the scale of pro-active moms, retard moms rank just above soccer moms in their devotion to their spawn, and if this post isn't making much sense it's because I am distraught, but I already said that, didn't I.
Oh, yeah, this made me distraught because I thought I was going fast when they passed me.
I'm sorry, this isn't working out like I planned.
Honestly, my brain has turned to mush.