My crazy cousins

I had one cousin who never knew he was adopted.

I had another cousin who shot himself in the foot in Vietnam so they wouldn't send him back into combat, they sent him back anyway, and he got shot again, this time by the bad guys, and now he is the president of some postal union somewhere in the suburbs outside of Detroit.

I had another cousin who just a couple of months after she got her drivers license had an accident killing her best friend. My cousin spent some time in the hospital and after that she refused to drive, then she became anorexic, then she got married three times, then she found jesus and now she is running a youth camp, whatever the hell that is, down in North Carolina.

I had another cousin who joined the army, and was then kicked out of the army for not being able to conform, who claimed he lived in a cave on the California coast with some ex Manson Family members, who once borrowed twenty dollars from me and never paid me back, who worked every con in the book until he tried to work a con on a guy who knew how to swing a mean two by four, and is now living in a nursing home somewhere out west and wondering why everyone has turned their back on him.

And I don't know why I keep saying I had another cousin, because I still have them. Well, except for ...

I had another cousin, a drunk, one of the lovable kind, who died in his basement all alone, too drunk to do anything about it.

It's raining now, or maybe it's just Carlotta Monti with a garden hose, either way I'm going to try to get some sleep.
Kiss, kiss, take care.